Just call me sookylalaweepyemotionalwrecksleepstandingupmcwhingepants. I am truly stuffed. I've got past the 10 week mark and the nausea is finally wearing off but the tiredness and weepiness are still in full swing and making up for the waning nausea. Last weekend I slept 11 hours on saturday night (officially a nanna) and then on sunday had an involuntary nap - it forced itself on me - for 2 whole hours!!! That is unheard of, even for sleep-loving me. Maybe its the universes way of giving me all this sleep before I have the cherub and I forget what sleep is. I already daydream about walking around like a zombie for the first months of my jellybean's life, so I'm trying to think of ways I can sleep while doing housework - I'll let you know if I come up with something (I reckon I'll end up pretty rich if I think of something, so you may never hear from me again! Especially if I'm on my own private island...).
Last week I was almost at my end point.. the stress of becoming one of the locals "up the duff and jobless" was getting too much for me and I was nearly having serial conniptions. I'm surprised the bun is still hanging around in the oven! I reckon if its still there, its there to stay after the last week or so. Anyway, I went for a job interview last wednesday and it went ok (as good as any interview could be, you all know you walk out and think "I should've said this and that") and the only drawback is that its as far away from home as physically possible without having to catch a plane to work. Then on the way back from the interview I got a call from my current (awesome) boss telling me my current contract has been extended 3 more months and they will advertise the role. Bloody hell. They know how to push a girl to the edge. Prior to that call I had 6 working days left and now its 3 months and 6 days. Wow. How things can change in 5 minutes. And if they advertise, that would be a good thing because I have a chance at my own job rather than them giving it to someone else (which was their original plan). So now the thing is - what if I get the job on the other side of the planet when I might have a chance at my own job 5 minutes from home. Do I gamble - throw away the permanent job (and paid maternity leave) to hope I'll get a permanent job nearby? Ahhh geez. I think I'll take the job that I have to travel through time. At least its guaranteed. I'm hoping if I get the job, my boss can tell the powers that be and they'll beg me to stay - LOL, its the government, as if. (I'm secretly hoping I don't get the interuniverse job so I don't have to make the decision).
The other day Joe and I went to the cinema (yes kids, you too can look forward to getting old and excited that this is your big night out). We saw the Hunger Games which was very good and during one of the ads prior to the movie, I think they were advertising deodorant or a car or fertiliser - and I started crying. Lordy lord lord, I am officially a sook. If you've seen the Hunger Games, one of the characters dies (its not a spoiler) and I balled uncontrollably for 5-10mins. I can be in the car belting out Flame Trees by Cold Chisel at the top of my voice (yes, it happens often and often by myself) and I have to dodge the semi-trailer coming towards me because the tears are obstructing my view of the road. (Note to all - stay off the roads around Ipswich/Boonah/Rosewood/Esk/Fernvale for the next 5-6months or so). Emotional and unsafe. What a package I am. I'm not sure why I wasn't snapped up earlier.
So last week, I discover my uterus. Not in a kinky-internal kinda way but in a normal palpable external kinda way. The books (or baby bibles I like to call them because every word they speak happens on time and I'm a believer) say that my uterus has grown just big enough to pop out above my pubic bone. So when I'm not having a particularly bloaty day (VERY rare) I can feel my hard little uterus that is the size of a grapefruit. So I tell Joe alllll about it (like I've said many times, poor Joe, he hears about EVERYTHING which is probably way too many female bodily functions for the male species to still be attracted to us) and Joe freaks out. Maybe I finally found his tolerance level. He can't handle the whole living-organism-in-my-abdomen thing. He relates it to alien. So of course, I forced him to feel it "but its your baby honey" "surely you want to feel your baby" etc etc. He caved and felt the hard grapefruit and is not a fan - still creepy. Not gushing over "ohhh thats my baby" oh no, more like "ewww thats creepy and I'm waiting for a hand to reach out and grab me". So darling you're not going to feel the baby kicking when it starts happening? NOOOOOO way says Joe. Hopefully I can force him then too. This kind of stuff only happens once or twice. Notice I didn't go for more than twice!
First scan is in less than 2 weeks. Joe just wants to see if there's more than one heartbeat. I think if there's more than one heartbeat, mine may stop so they'll end up with 2 heartbeats overall. In the beginning of the pregnancy I had a dream about twins (being reefed out of my womanly bits) and 2 people mentioned twins when we told them. So, Joe is hanging off all these ideas. There are no twins in my family or Joe's but they say as you get older there are higher chances of ovulating 2 eggs at once (you can call me superovulator if thats the case). Pfffft there's only one in there and if there's 2, they aren't mine, I'll have to question Joe. Oh wait...
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